Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Monday, December 29, 2008


I have a job interview tomorrow.

I pray that I get it, because it seems to be a position that will give me VERY valuable experience for what I plan to do with my life.

So dear friends, if you're reading this, please help me doa that I will be the one considered for the job and outshine the other 4 who were called for the interview.

Wish me luck!

Saturday, December 27, 2008

The Highway Code

I found out recently that there is apparently something called "The Highway Code". Now, I find this very interesting because it is a contrast of good and bad for me and I just cannot decide which one rules over which.

Here's how it goes:

If you're driving along the highway, and a car which is going the other way starts flashing their headlights even though there is no car in front of them (signaling that they want to overtake and that the car in front should move out of the way), then odds are there is a roadblock ahead.

On the way back from out trip, there was this one car flashing on the other side of the road. I asked my husband why the driver was flashing when there was absolutely no one in front of him, and my husband explained the code to me.

Cars around us started to slow down, very obviously. After 5 minutes of driving, there was nothing, so the skeptical me wondered if there really was such a thing. Yet, the cars around us all remained at 110. After about 10 minutes, we finally saw the signs: a traffic jam, followed by people in white uniforms standing around with clipboards. So there really WAS a roadblock and the guy was apparently trying to warn us.

Now, I know the first thing that would come to people's minds is the fact that doing this just encourages those dangerous drivers out there, who recklessly do whatever they want on the road on whatever speeds they choose.

On the other hand, I think there's just something sweet about these selfish (if you're a Malaysian driver, you know what I mean) drivers helping some stranger out when normally, they would just cut you off on the road and refuse to let you cut in no matter how long you've been signaling. There's just something cute and utterly ironic about the code, and I can't help but smile at what a contrast it makes in my mind...

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Gajah Sama Gajah Bergaduh, Pelanduk Mati Di Tengah-Tengah

Ever gotten totally stuck in the middle of something you really don't want to be stuck in? Well, apparently, I am right now. And not just stuck in one situation, I'm stuck in multiples.

Things have been going quite well, except these things happen and I guess that's what life is all about. It takes the bad to balance out the good and I suppose it's what keeps us grounded.

But seriously, being stuck in the middle is not a good position to find yourself in. At all.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Tasik Chenderoh

The first thing that will hit you is the contrast between the extremely well preserved, green landscape around you and the good condition of the road that you'll be travelling on. How can such a seemingly untouched destination have such a good road system? That's one magic of Tasik Chenderoh, or, better known to the locals as Tasik Raban, in the Lenggong district, Perak Darul Ridzuan.

The first night I spent there was in Tanjung Harapan Chalets. A small, locally-owned "resort" located on a little cape, which can only be reached by boat from a small jetty. The reason being, the land part of it is surrounded by the woods. The cape consists of simple A-huts, lined along the shores of the lake, surrounded by land which the owner's son described as a campground for those who wanted to rough it out.

The jetty parking was flooded when we got there!

Ok, I know this picture is funny, cuz the kid's head is missing, but that's the small little jetty which leads out to the lake, and where little children were jumping into the water from

Tanjung Harapan's jetty, also flooded

The kambing we made friends with

neatly lined A-huts. Half of them were flooded

Being a city gal who did not expect to be roughing ANYTHING out, I did not take to the simple conditions and the fact that outhouses had no running water.

The place was perfect for backpackers and people who were on adventures, but not for me, and apparently, not for one of my companions either. We left the next day, after a beautiful one hour boat ride around the lake.

My definition of a lake has always been a small body of water. That day, I discovered just how vast a "small" body of water can be. If I had driven the boat myself, I would have probably gotten us lost in the endless twists and turns, so fascinated was I with the beautiful landscape it provided, so amazed was I with just how big the lake was.

Moi. Please ignore muka tembam tak cukup tido tu

Pretty, pretty lilypads


Overall, our stay there (two A-Huts for one night at RM50 each, dinner and breakfast for three (RM50), an hour's boat trip (RM100) cost us RM250.

We almost gave up and went home, if my husband had not suggested the Tasik Raban Resort, which he had read about when we were researching the place. I was glad.

The well-kept landscape around the chalets

The little huts where one can enjoy the scenic view

The view from our room

The Tasik Raban Resort is a small resort manned by the Majlis Daerah Lenggong. It costs somewhere around 3.8 million. Money well-spent I would say. The resort consists of ten standard rooms for two at RM80 a night on weekdays and two family sized-rooms for four (chalet with two bedrooms and a living room) for only RM150 a night! The rooms are complete, with aircond, comfortable beds, water heater, coffee-making facilities (coffee not provided), sejadah, ironing board, a television set, towels, soap, and most importantly, a BIG balcony overlooking the beautiful, idyllic Raban Lake.

While food is not that easily found in the area, one can always rely on the Tasik Raban R&R, located off the main road, right across the lake from the Tasik Raban Resort. The stall on the utmost left, which is manned by two very nice women and a mamak serves delightful "roti canai". The best part is, the one cooking the roti is not the mamak, but the makcik! The roti canai is made just right, light and fluffy and slightly crunchy. Those with big appetites will not be able to stop at just one helping.

In the mornings, the stall also serves nasi lemak. It is generously proportioned, with a helping of rendang, sambal ikan bilis, cucumbers and half an egg. And guess what? If you order a "nasi lemak telur mata", they don't charge you extra for the egg. In KL, normally, nasi lemak like that would cost around 3.50 - 4.00 per plate. One morning, on my more recent trip, we ordered:

3 nasi lemak telur mata
1 nasi lemak biasa
2 milo ais
1 teh ais
i kopi panas

Guess how much it all amounted to?

in KL:

Nasi Lemak: 3.00
Nasi lemak telur mata: 4.00
milo ais: 1.80
teh ais: 1.80
kopi panas: 1.40

almost RM20 right?

They charged us RM14.50
A meal for two in KL = A meal for four in Perak.

The best part was, that morning, my husband's kopi panas was bitter, so he only drank half of it. When we came again that night, the woman came to our table and apologised for the kopi. Apparently, they had noticed that it was only half-touched, so they tested it and discovered that it was too bitter. So not only is the food cheap and good, the service is personalised as well!

During lunch, for a change of taste, we would hop over to the Medan Ikan Bakar, just a short drive away on the main road. Only open during lunch, it serves really good ikan bakar, marinated in some sauce, served with kuah asam. The fish is reared and really fresh. A typical meal there, with each of us taking white rice and other lauk, plus the ikan bakar and the drinks usually cost around RM30++, for four. Some might think that it's expensive. Trust me, it's not. Ikan bakar, white rice and individual lauk for four people, RM30 is really cheap compared to the exhorbitant prices we have to pay in KL for fresh fish.

But enough about food. What does one do in Tasik Chenderoh?

Well, for those adventurous types, there's always hiking at the Lata Kekabu, a waterfall, in which you have to hike a ways up in order to reach the main waterfall. After hiking, cool yourselves by plunging into the waters. You can also go spelunking at the caves.

Beautiful Lata Kekabu

For those who would prefer a laid-back holiday, there's always fishing. You can rent a boat for the day for a mere RM80 at the R&R. Or you could visit the Lenggong Archeology Museum. Or swim in the lake. Or just have a picnic by the waterfall. But please remember to bring a plastic bag and throw your rubbish responsibly.

I never thought of Perak as much of a holiday destination, but being there, seeing all this, I came to appreciate what we have here in Malaysia a little bit more. From cheap, good food, comfortable resting places, adventurous hikes and campgrounds, it seems that Tasik Chenderoh has got it all. If you can bear to leave the internet just for a few days, it's definitely worth the 3 hour (if you're from KL) journey to Perak.

Soon to come when I get less lazy: pictures.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Of Results, Decisions and the Future

Lately, a lot of good things seem to be coming to me. I am caught in a bubble of excitement and happiness and satisfaction, and yet in a way, it's making me even more confused about my choices in life.

I know I've blogged about this before, but now that I know i might be able to get somewhere, there seems to be so many places to go to. And ALL of them appeal to me and I realise that I just cannot afford to make the wrong decision right now.

Suddenly, the complications of life is rushing towards me in a manner that makes me feel as if I'm about to get hit by a really large bus. And I still have no idea what to do. The choices and opportunities I have are massive and yet I have to choose very carefully or I risk taking the wrong step and botching my life up.

It's easy for other people to give me advice:

Be a lecturer. It's easy. You get good pay and when the students are on leave, you get leave too.

Bear in mind that the people saying this aren't lecturers. Also, this isn't my first choice, since I really have no intention of teaching despite the course I took. As someone once said "For most people, the degree is just a way for them to get a job"

Continue your studies! This way, you don't lose your momentum. And it's WAAAYYY easier to get financial support, especially with your results. You can lobby for a scholarship

I WANT to do this. Only one problem. I'm slightly tired of studying. Really.

Work first. You can always continue later. If you continue now then you won't have the experience you need to do your dissertation. Also, your perceptions will have changed and it will be easier for you


See, I have a plan. Sorta. But when I tell someone (read: a person who thinks they have WAY more experience and knowledge than I do and is superior in every way) I can see their reactions. They work hard to maintain their politeness when they ask me the question "Why?" And honestly, I see the way they struggle to understand my reasons and I can practically FEEL them chucking it out of their minds just the way they do with trash.

And then, disregarding everything I've just said, they give their reasons (the bold words above) as to why I SHOULD continue my studies/work/be a lecturer NOW NOW NOW.

Dearest Makcik/Pakcik/Aunty/Uncle:

I appreciate your advice, I really do. But right now I am confused. And I know you're just trying to make me un-confused, but really, you're not. Somehow, I feel this expectation put upon my humble shoulders and that should I pursue a course different to the one that you've recommended, then I will somehow or other disappoint and hurt you. I don't intend to, please bear that in mind. I just want to do this for myself, not for you or any other person. I want to chart my own course in life and I want to be happy doing it, and if I try to please all of you, I doubt I will be.

So I will take your advice into careful consideration and decide for myself what is right and what it wrong, and always know that whatever I choose for myself, I CHOSE IT. No one else. And with that, I will bear all responsibilities and consequences as results of my actions.

Thank you.

So, time to close my eyes and take a HUGE leap of faith. Wish me luck.

Gastronomic Delight?

I was reading through I Do Things So You Don't Have To (refer to my bloglist, I'm feeling a little bit lazy) and came across the term Geoduck, pronounced as Gooey Duck. Now, contrary to what I thought when I first came across the term, it is not a duck, nor is it gooey, it's some kind of sea creature that people eat, apparently.

Now, the name sounds slightly weird, so I decided to click on the link that the author provided, which I'm providing here also. CLICK!

Doesn't it remind you of something? Heh.

On a WAAAYYY different note, results are out!
I'm happy.
And more confused than ever now.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Choose Wisely

Sometimes, I don't understand men. I'm married to one, yes, obviously, but I'd have to say that he's not very typical. I understand him better than I do most other men and yet there are still some thing about him that my simpleton mind is unable to grasp. Like how he insists on chucking all his dirty laundry on the floor. Or how he can spend hours and hours in front of the computer/laptop (yes, he has both) playing a game or reading comics without getting hungry or tired or sleepy.

Regardless of this, I am still very thankful for the fact that I have him and no one else (I am talking as if other people would actually want me.LOL) simply for the fact that he is a MAN. Not a boy.

Here are the differences between men and boys.

1. A MAN breaks up with you when he no longer thinks the relationship is working. A BOY simply disappears and makes excuses while he leaves you hanging.

I've witnessed this countless of times before. People, if you don't want her anymore, then let her go. Don;t leave her there wondering what's going on, if the relationship is still going strong and if so, why you don't seem to want to contact her. It's just distasteful. Set her free so that she can find a new life and hopefully, someone MUCH better than you who actually treats her like a human being.

And girls, please. If the boyfriend refuses to grow some balls and make some decisions, you HAVE to do it. Give him an ultimatum. Buck up or get out. Pure and simple. I'm a girl too. I realise how difficult it is to let go of someone you (think?) you love but sometimes, you have to be selfish and think "I am better than that. I'm better than him".

2. A MAN treats you like a woman should be treated. A BOY treats you like a toy/pet.

This is, in theory, not a very difficult concept to grasp but people seem to have problems with it anyway. It's simple: If he calls you only when he's bored, takes you out only when it suits him, talk to you only when there's absolutely no one else to talk to, he's a boy.

Retreat slowly, and when he's not looking, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE.

3. A MAN puts you at the top of his list of priorities. Expect to be way below on a Boy's. His friends WILL come first.

True story. This one guy I know treats us (his friends) like queens/kings. He's nice, approachable, always there for us, is concerned to the point of being slightly ridiculous. Basically, he's someone who I KNOW would wake up at 3 AM, get out of bed and come to my rescue if I called him in distress.

And yet, when he's with his girlfriend, he's so different it's mind boggling. The way he looks at her, the way he treats her, the way he TALKS to her. It's like she's the most unimportant thing in his life.

How do I put this BOY in the same league as the person I know? I don't. There's FRIEND and there's BOY. They're two totally different entities that share the same body to me.

4. A MAN reassures you when you're being insecure and paranoid. A BOY just gets offended and snaps your head off.

It's real simple. Everyone has their insecurities. If you're matured enough to understand that you'll deal with it tastefully instead of losing your head and being a delinquent about it.

All a woman needs is reassurance that she's still the most important person in your life and that you have eyes only for her. No need to accuse her to not trusting you, or of being clingy (unless she really is).

5. A MAN stays true. A BOY cheats.

Boys will have many excuses for this, ranging from "I was never happy!" to "I'm bored" to "menyampah" to "They each have what the other doesn't. I can't let go, I love them both"

Girls, if you're in a realtionship with a BOY, reconsider, PLEASE. It's not worth it. Really.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

How it Feels to be a T-Rex

My mother and sister recently joined a women's-only gym located in Kota Damansara, which is pretty cool since it's got a fixed routine which everybody goes through everytime they go there.

The benefit of joining this gym instead of the normal ones is that you get to do that particular fixed routine without having to enlist the help of a personal trainer. If you notice, with other gyms (unless you're really well-versed in the "art" of working out) people who cannot afford the luxury of trainers often wander around in a daze and finally settle on using the same machines over and over again, which isn't that conducive since they pretty much concentrate on one part of the body instead of spreading it out.

So this gym basically gives you a fixed, complete exercise routine instead of having to fork out extra for a personal trainer.

Since my mother got a new job, however, they haven't been going, so a few weeks ago mama decided that she'd pass her membership to me, which the gym agreed, for a small fee of RM150, since they'd have to test and appraise my weight and fat and water, etc.

So on friday, I happily went, paid the turnover fee and discovered that my weight is 35% fat! (the acceptable amount for someone my age is 25% and below, so you can imagine how horrified I was) and did the routine.

I got kinda stuck at one of those weight-lifting thingies. My arms were wobbly to begin with and after 3/4 lifts, I found out that I just couldn't do it anymore. Me, being stubborn and embarassed at how out-of-shape I was, decided tojust try harder and my body just ended up contorting in such a weird and dangerous way that I gave up after a few tries.

To make a long(er) story short, I woke up the next day and my arms were bent and I couldn't straighten them! They hurt like crazy everytime I try and I have to keep them in front of me.

I feel like a T-rex.

Friday, December 12, 2008

These blogs never fail to crack me up..

Yes. I know it's easier to just leave them on the links thingy at the side, but their more recent posts were really really funny...

Blog Anak Mat Nor and I Do Things So You Don't Have To

Check them out.

What I learnt this year...


1. That it is possible for blatant racism to outweigh years and years of friendship

2. That family loyalty can happen to an extent that people with 'high' credentials become idiots.

3. That selfishness knows no boundaries, and transcends familial bonds

4. That people fear and hate what they don't understand

5. That people only watch and judge from the outside without considering what goes in internally

6. That everybody can be hypocrites.

Including me.

7. That people you barely know and refuse to get to know may turn out to be surprisingly more supportive that people you've known for years

8. That people put greater things at stake just so they don't get embarassed

9. That someone may hate another person, but be exactly like them.

10. That you may wake up one day and realise that the person you've slept next to for decades isn't the person you think he/she is at all.


1. Upon arriving, we were horrified to find out that at least two walls were covered in tarp, still under construction

2. On the ground floor driveway, there were white boards covering a portion of the place, indicating that there were sections still not ready

3. After scrutinizing the windows/sliding doors from outside, it was obvious that a whole lot of rooms were still unfurnished, and seemingly incomplete

4. They had just laid down the welcome mats

5. There was no direct access to the carpark from the lift since they CLOSED IT DOWN due to construction

6. The carpark was glaringly under construction, with sounds of drills and hammering echoing through the lobby

7. Upon entering our room, about 5 minutes later, some guys knocked on the door claiming that they had wanted to DO SOME MAINTENANCE WORK ON THE ROOM and had no idea that guests had just checked in

8. A portion of the wall of the room was not painted properly yet

(The next few are mengada complaints on my part. They were due to circumstances, not the fault of the resort or the staff itself)

9. There was no balconey

10. There was no beach

11. I couldn't hear the waves! ALl I could hear from my window was drilling and the sound of the vent of the marina club downstairs

(back to proper compaints now)

12. When we tried to check out, they claimed that they could not refund our money because we had booked on fucking line.

13. they did NOTHING to compensate our dissatisfaction

14.They insisted we pay up the full amount.


15. When my mother in law called to yell at them, boleh la pulaakkkk refund our money. Macam mana tu?

My question is, my dear Avillion Admiral Cove administration

1. Why, oh, why did you not warn people on your website that YOU WERE NOT READY TO RECEIVE GUESTS?

2. Do you always pull con-jobs on your guests?

3. Oh, and by the way, I overheard a conversation one of your receptionists had with a potential guest who wanted to book a night there, I HEARD NO WARNINGS WHATSOEVER ABOUT THE INCOMPLETE STATE OF YOUR RESORT.

TOLONG LAH JAWAB, and spare me those "sorry sir, ma'am. There's abso-fucking-lutely nothing we can do. SO sorry so sorry so sorry". Those you can shove up your ass. ( I realise that these people won't have the time to read this but it makes me feel good ranting anyway)



1. Simply for being complete and NOT UNDER CONSTRUCTION
2. For not being pretentious
3. For not being fully booked
4. For having a balconey
5. For giving us a seaview room
6. From which I can hear the waves
7. For actually having a beach out back.

*On another note, I would like to state here the the AVILLION ADMIRAL COVE would probably be a really nice resort WHEN IT IS FINALLY OFFICIALLY COMPLETE. TAPII sebab they tried to pull one over us, I'd just like to recommend you NOT TO GO THERE. hmph. puas hati.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

I'm off again!

I haven't even posted any pictures of Chenderoh yet and I'm off again. To PD. AGAIN! Lol.

Going to PD for the night to celebrate our 1st anniversary. A year really does whizz by huh?

Monday, December 1, 2008

After 4 years

Today, I said goodbye to a dear friend, whom I've known for four whole years.

We became friends even before I got to know my husband, and have stayed close for the whole of my duration in college. He was there for me when I was at my lowest, always knew when I felt sad and helped another person (who is also far away) pick me up during those times when I was down.

I know Kedah isn't that far away (compared to Paris, where the other dear friend is now forging a new life for herself), and that I can visit anytime I choose, but given my financial status right now, it seems just as distant. The way I felt while I said goodbye today wasn't at all different than the way I did when I sent off (figuratively speaking, I didn't really send her off at the airport) my friend who was bound for France. The sadness was the same, because although I know we'll be able to visit, and they will one day come back to KL, I realise that I won't be able to call them out whenever I please or laugh with them face to face whenever I feel down or miss them.

I know my posts have been quite jiwang lately. Do bear with me. I'm bound for change, something I've always had to adjust to quite slowly.

So anyway, to those two who helped pick me up those not so distant 2 1/2 years ago, let's not let these years of friendship stop at four yeah? I'd like you guys to see my future babies, and I'd like to see you get married (Kepah) and your first babies (both of you) and I'd love for our kids to be friends and play with each other. LOL.

Sunday, November 30, 2008


Set in the 1940's, 'Partition' is the story of an ex Sikh Soldier, Gian (Jimi Mistry) and a young muslim girl, Naseem played by Kristin Kreuk, who fall in love with each other despite the horrendous conflicts between the two cultures.

Gian saves Naseem's life after almost her whole tribe (who were on a journey to Pakistan to escape the conflicts in India) was slaughtered in a brutal attack by Gian's village people.

They fall in love only to face opposition from both parties.

It was a sad love story, almost like Romeo and Juliet, yet even more tragic, in a way. The hatred of both parties were so apparent, so horrendously taken to a whole new level that they failed to be able to distinguish the good and the bad.

People were discriminated against.

And yet, the couple love each other so much that one was willing to travel miles and miles in order to see the other, and actually converted to Islam just so he could be with her. This act was only met by more resistance. It didn't matter that he was now a muslim. He was born a Sikh, which meant that although he was innocent of the murders, he was associated with the people who was of the same origins who committed them.

Ridiculous, yes, but no one saw that.

It somehow reminds me of our situation. I know, it is in no way even close to what happened in the movie. And yet I still wonder, what if it was? Would we see the wrongs of our ways and let go of all the stereotypes that was so blatant in the movie? Or would we succumb to the very mistakes that the people in the movie made? Would we realise that people are people and that not everyone is the same or would we point the finger at someone just because he was born of a certain race, not caring at all what his individuality may tell us?

You decide.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Every Part 1 needs a continuation

But I think I'll leave it at part one this time around. Too much time has passed and my memory has worn thin.

On to newer experiences.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Bring me Back

I want to go back to that place where I left my cares behind. Where all that existed for me at that moment in time was him, me and the beautiful bluish green waters of the South China Sea.

I want to experience that sense of freedom again, where the most important decision I had to make was where to have my next meal.

Give me that sensation of peace again. The one I felt so intensely as I was swimming around a little island with him, ungracefully aided by a little orange life vest that ultimately saved me from sunburn.

Hand me that short feeling of panic, and later, wonder, I felt at encountering those harmless, but daunting looking things that our romantic minds imagined as sharks, but in reality could have just been some enormous, exotic fishes.

Take me back to the time that I forgot the world and smiled and laughed without care, right before reality came crashing down on me.


Picture from (click)

Thursday, November 20, 2008

What I want to be when I Grow Up

Lol. Tak sedar diri kan? Dah jadi bini orang tak grow up lagi ke?

But this is the standard essay that we have to write in school every year, so saya perasan la, konon2 I'm still in school.

I'm so confused right now. There are so many things I want to do with my life, but I don't really have a definite plan, and a part of me is panicking and wondering if I will ever be successful...

So here are the things I want to do

1. Travel - I so want to see the world before I have to settle down. But then I need money, of course, which brings me to:

2. Get a stable job. After 4 years of studying to be a teacher, I now realise that I may not have the talent for that, especially when it comes to teaching hormone ridden bratty teenagers who think they are all grown up but in reality are still whiny little kids. So now I am rethinking my options. I still love the language very much and would love to sink myself into a career where I can write... I just don't know. I also enjoyed it whenever I did any volunteer work (especially when it came to events), but I'm really not sure how I can translate that into the working world. Not yet, anyway.

3. I REALLY want to do my Masters. But I'm I'm a bit tired of studying. Seriously. I've been going to school since I was 2 (yes, I know, kindergarten doesn't count, but I didn't go to those main-main kindergartens/taska/nursery types, I actually went to a kindergarten where the teachers taught us stuff and were very very garang and had lots of homework), and I'm now 23. You do the math. Lately, I've been having a hard time cramming any information into my little brain, so while I long to continue my studies, I do admit that I should be taking a break.

4. Stay at home and just rest. Not really an option since I need to contribute to the finances now that I'm married.

5. Have KIDS. Not right now, I guess, since I'm neither emotionally or financially or physically (yeke?) ready for it.

SO, what I figure is:

I will work temporarily, for about a year or two, and then either take a break to do my masters or do it part-time, and go travelling while I'm at it!


I don't know.

Right now, the same phrase keeps running through my head over and over again:


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

For those who like cats...

I present to you....



*Video taken from YOUTUBE

Tuesday, November 18, 2008


Taken from


12:00a.m. 22nd October 2008

| By Bruce McKean of the Mackay Mercury

Hardened police officers have been shocked by the horrifying torture, mutilation and brutal slaying of a seven-month-old fox terrier puppy near Mackay at the weekend.

Two men, charged with the brutal killing, entered no pleas when they fronted a Mackay court yesterday.

They are due in court again today.

If found guilty, they could face up to two years in prison.

The incident is alleged to have happened in the mining community of Moranbah, west of the central Queensland city.

Police have obtained video footage from a mobile phone which shows graphic images of the puppy yelping and howling in terrible pain as it hacked to pieces....

Read more here

Now, I'm actually quite terrified of dogs, but I do admit that some are cute. Not to say that I would ever go near or touch one of them. Like I said, I'm terrified of dogs.

But seriously lah. What the heck? Jahat gila.

Monday, November 17, 2008

The Grinch

Have you ever met someone who LOVES asking for favours but absolutely DETESTS it when someone does it to them in turn? I have. Apparently some people never change.

It's not that I don't like helping people. Within reason, by all means, ask me. But when someone constantly asks and asks and asks and makes a face equivalent to

when the other person asks for one eeny meeny lemon squeezy favour, then that person is officially an arse.

*Sigh* I cannot believe I still fall for it. So I guess I'm the dumb one.. :(

Insensitivity... this postcard I found when browsing.

Postcard courtesy of PostSecret

Saturday, November 15, 2008

All Done.

I finished my last paper yesterday. It felt slightly anti-climactic. We finished the paper and people went home. And that was it.

I've slightly mixed feelings. I feel sad because I won't be seeing some of these people who I just got to know despite almost 4 years of being class/coursemates. Of course, not to mention those I'm close to and HAVE BEEN there for me for all these years no matter what. And at the same time, I'm happy that I'm almost done with fulfilling my own requirement. I'm enthusiastic about the fact that dramas with divas will soon be part of a past that I'd rather not want to go back to. I'm happy that I won't go through all the hypocrisy anymore.

It feels really scary, leaving my comfort zone. It's weird that I say that now, but I've come to realise that the faculty (more like the familiar faces around it, actually) has actually become part of my comfort zone.

So what now?
Onwards and forwards with life I guess.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

PD Part 1- U8A Farewell Trip

We left at around 10/10.30 if I'm not mistaken and since most of the drivers didn't really know how to get to PD, we convoyed. There were 6 cars altogether, and before we even left Shah Alam, 2 cars got lost because the driver who led the convoy didn't really know how to, I reckon.

Group photo before leaving

In the car

But anyway, after several stops along the way, we finally reached PD at around 1.30 pm. And since check-in time was 3.00 pm, we drove to Teluk Kemang to have some lunch and lepak, at which point one of our classmates announced that his grandpa had invited us over to his place. We didn't really feel like going at first, and a few people protested because we were exhausted, but in the end, I'm really glad we did go. The house was beautiful, and exotic. I had never really seen a real-life authentic Kampung-Style house in person before, and I really loved what I saw. The house was spacious, airy and spic and span, and the hosts were really awesome. Upon reaching, we found out that they had prepared kuihs and tea for us, and had even prepped the living room to fit all of us in! We had a wonderful time there, thanks Atok. ;p

A lalat-filled restaurant at Teluk Kemang :(

Post-lunch group photo at Teluk Kemang

Nor, Myself and Emily

Irda and Bibung at Atuk's beautiful Kampung-Style house

Us with Atuk(in the background)

Group photo outside Atuk's house

After about an hour, we left for the hotel, but the same classmate who invited us over to his Atok's house brought us over to this island. We had fun just walking around and taking pictures, and I saw some umang-umang (those little crabs, don't know what they call 'em in English). There were hundreds of them! We didn't spend much time there, but we loved it anyways.


Group photo on the little island

We reached the hotel at around 4.30. Some people had chosen to skip the house call and had decided to check-in ahead of us, so we just joined them in the rooms, and since my roommate (Lala) and I were slightly late, we got stuck with the single bedded room (read: glorified closet). We made do, though, since it was only one night in that room.

After freshening up and a change of clothes, we went down and took more pictures with our friends. At which point, it started raining. However, since the activities had been planned already, we went ahead with it.

Before the Activities started: saya nampak gemok.

We played some silly "sukaneka" games, like passing water balloons and creating sand-animals (ours was a snake, we got last place though), as well as a game called "galah panjang". After most of our classmates went up to shower and get ready for dinner, some of us stayed behind and played soccer with the guys. I sucked at it, and almost sprained my ankle, but I was laughing all the way. ;p


see the difference?

After showering, I went up to check out what the other girls were doing since my room was really quiet (there were 6 of us, and I guess we didn't really mix) while Lala (my roommate) prepped herself for dinner. I had a blast! Mind you, these girls were the quiet ones in class but they really made me feel welcome that night. (Bibung, Irda, Sara, Bibi, Shaz, Ayu, Nor, Em, Kak Mini) I stayed there laughing my ass off until around 8.30 when the guys called and said we should come down for dinner.

I went down together with my original housemates and we helped the guys prepare dinner while waiting for the other girls to come down. So many things happened that night:

1. Dinner - uneventful, until the equipment (I'm not sure what they were) that they used to cook the kerang exploded into one of the guys' backs. Yikes!

2. After dinner, some of the girls were taking pictures, and someone (something?) else besides thm appeared beside one of them in the pictures. That was scary. The guys were trying to placate them by saying that it was just a reflection of some sort, but later on, one of them admitted to me that they were just trying to calm everyone down and that none of them had ever seen such a reflection before.

I just want to add that the image actually started fading the next morning, and by the time I had the guts to actually see it, the face was totally gone.

3. Snack. Snake. See the difference? Apparently, some of the girls didn't HEAR the difference. Here's the dialogue:

Payed: Tu, ambik snack tu, Em

Em: hah?

Payed: Tu, ada snack tu

Em: (with a panicked look on her face) WHERE?!?

Payed: Tu, snack tu kat belakang ko.

At which point, Em, Irda, Bibung and Lala SHRIEK and ran towards us, and I realised that they thought he said "snake"



But yeah, I love these people. I never thought I'd have that much fun with them.

I didn't take any pictures that night. Malas. Those who did, though, found some interesting/scary images along with their own.

Anyway, our so called "campfire" session ended at 12.00 o'clock. Lala and I made our way up, changed and hung out at the balconey and watched class C (who were coincidentally there on the same days as well) hang out downstairs by the beach,at which point someone noticed us there and beckoned for us to come down, which we did.

We watched some guys play "Truth or Dare" (the real version) and had the time of our lives, since they were dared to do all kinds of silly things (hula dances, striptease, catwalk "America's Next Top Model" style. We hung out til about 3.30 and I conked out as soon as I got upstairs.

The next morning was spent just lounging around the hotel and taking pictures. Hilmi brought us to PD town just so we could walk around, and Cikgu, Lala and I said goodbye to the rest while we waited for my husband and Lampi to arrive.

Full stop.

I have seriously misjudged a lot of people. A LOT.

I'm tired of being angry or hurt, now I'm just pensive, I suppose.

I refused to see it before, but I do now. This is the last I'll think of it, and then I'm done.

No more ditching, no more forgiving, no more waiting, no more being sad. I'm drawing the line here.


And let me tell you, I am glad that this is finally going to be over.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Bangsa Kita

Papa (sejak kecil lagi, saya memanggil Pak Uda saya dengan panggilan "Papa" dan Mak Uda dengan panggilan "Mummy") bekerja sebagai seorang pengurus di restoran terkenal di Johor Bahru. Biarlah nama restoran itu menjadi rahsia, kecuali kepada sesiapa yang mengenali.

Sebelum saya teruskan, saya ingin tekankan di sini bahawa Papa adalah berbangsa Cina dan telah memluk agama Islam semasa mengahwini Mummy.

Pada suatu hari, seorang makcik tua yang bertudung bersama-sama dengan suaminya telah mendekati kaunter bayaran setelah selesai menikmati hidangan di restoran tersebut. Kebetulan, Papa sedang menjaga kaunter pada hari itu. Apabila makcik tersebut ternampak kelibat Papa, mukanya berubah. Dengan suara yang kuat dan nada yang marah, dia berkata "KALAU AKU TAU AWAL2 TOKEI KEDAI NI CINA, AKU TAK MAKAN KAT SINI TAU!" dan kemudian, dia berpusing kepada suaminya lalu berkata "ABANG, CAMPAK JE DUIT TU KAT MUKA DIA!"

Lalu suaminya yang dayus itu pun mencampakkan duitnya terus ke muka Papa saya.
Kerana mengenangkan maruah diri, Papa dengan sabarnya mengutip semua helaian duit kertas itu dan menghulurkannya semula kepada perempuan BERTUDUNG itu, sambil berkata "Kalau macam tulah, akak, saya HALALKAN makanan akak tadi". Dia mengeluarkan MYKAD kepunyaannya dan menunjukkannya kepada perempuan itu. "Untuk pengetahuan akak, saya orang Islam, sama macam akak. Akak ambilk lah balik duit ni".

Makcik bertudung dan suaminya itu terus berlalu tanpa berkata-kata.

Saya sedih. Mengapa? Kerana orang yang saya sayangi dihina dan dimaki dengan begitu sekali. Apakah dosa Papa kepada makcik itu? Hanya kerana dia berbangsa Cina, perlukah dia diherdik dan dicerca sebegitu rupa?

Kita semua manusia, layakkah kita menentukan siapa yang baik dan siapa yang jahat? Siapa tahu, mungkin orang yang kita anggap hina itu begitu mulia di sisi Allah. Kita tak dapat duga, kan?

Kalau pun Papa bukan Islam, kenapa dia perlu dilayan begitu?

Beginikah kita menegakkan bangsa kita? Dengan menghina orang lain yang tidak melakukan apa-apa dosa kepada kita? Di mana maruah bangsa yang selalu diperkatakan itu jika duit boleh diCAMPAK ke muka orang lain hanya kerana rupanya seperti bangsa lain. Kalau iya pun dia berbangsa lain, perlukah?

Saya sedih. Jika begini bangsa kita, saya malu.

What written in this post was a true story. Papa now dons a songkok and his name tag that shows his Muslim name wherever he goes, because if he doesn't, he is treated like a second-class citizen. We're all Malaysians. Grow up.



You won't be reading this, but even though I haven't seen you in 10 years, I still remember how you sounded like when I was little. I remember the lilt of your voice whenever you spoke. The tone it took whenever you scolded Abang Jas for bullying me. I remember how you helped take care of me when my parents were off working, earning a living. I remember how young you were when you took responsibility for a lot of things, including how you took a bus all on your own at the wee age of ten, to take care of a young, pregnant, sickly woman as if she was your own mother.

May you rest in peace.

Please spare an Al-Fatihah for Allahyarhamah Azizah bt Abdullah who passed on at the young age of 33 on Saturday leaving 5 young children behind. Although I had not laid eyes on her for all those years, I still cherish her as an older sister, a che-che, that I never had.

To Mummy and Papa, Lissa and Abg Jas, I hope you all stay strong in the light of this tragedy. We're all here if you need our support.

Friday, November 7, 2008

I'm Back!

Updates later, with pictures, Insya Allah when the 'rajin'ness hits me. :p

Thursday, November 6, 2008


I'm an observer. When I go out with friends, sometimes I just prefer to sit quietly and see how everybody behaves or what other people have to say. I'm comfortable laughing along with the crowd without actually contributing any jokes of my own into the conversation (and with good reason. Every joke I'd make would probably kill a kitten with its lameness) Some may call that being stuck up or introverted, but I'd just like to call it "being-comfortable-enough-with-these-people-to-just-sit-back-and-bask".

Sometimes, though, I'm not really within my immediate group of friends. I sit with acquaintances who I've gotten to know. Or, while waiting for someone or something, I sit back, alone, and watch as people go by. (No, I don't stare at people and make them uncomfortable and be all stalker-like, although some might call it that). I just observe.

And it's funny sometimes, how oblivious some people can be about themselves.

To the reactions that people get when talking to them, to the faces people make when they approach, to the emotions that people show when they say something uncalled for.

I wonder if I'm ever like that. I'd like to think that when I say something that my friends might have gotten offended at, I'd realise it almost immediately and apologise soon after. I'd like to think that I'm observant enough to the people around me to know what kind of jokes might offend them and what might not. I hope.

But there are of course those rare(?) bunch people who don't care or don't want to care at all how much they may be hurting their friends or pushing them away with their attitudes or the way they think or simply with those so called "harmless" jokes that they make. And it's really sad, in a way, that they know so little about themselves and the people around them to actually know, or even care about what they might be doing.

I notice that slight widening of the eyes when one friend gets offended, or that little twitch right in the corner of the mouth that comes one split second after an offensive statement. If I were the on saying it, I'd probably stop and cover it up and somehow try to backtrack and cover it up with something else. Yet, some people can't, or even worse, won't. Some can actually see how offended people get when they say something, but insist on saying it anyway.

What is the point of laughing at someone's flaws or misfortune? Karma always comes back and bites you in the ass, or even worse, in the face. What is the point of pointing out something that embarasses someone else, especially if that someone else is a friend? Is it so satisfying to see a friend fall from way up there where you're standing? Is it such a relief to have it happen to someone else that you'd resist their friendship by pointing at them and laughing and laughing and laughing just because they're nice people who would be slightly emotional for a while and then laugh back just to show that they're "sporting"? Is it?

Because when you're in their place, it's not, apparently. When you're in their place, you tend to get upset when someone does it to you. And you forget that you've done it so many many times that that's all your friends remember you for.

So think and remember all those times you've offended someone just to make yourself feel better, and I really hope that it felt GREAT, because before you know it, you might find yourself at the butt of a cruel joke, and let me tell you, it won't feel that great.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


My mom-in-law told me something funny the other day.

She's apparently taking 3rd Language Classes at some college in KL (tak payahla bagitau nama kat sini ek?). One fine weekend, as she was about to get out of the car, she saw this person from my husband's past (his ex, lah). Because she really doesn't like this person, she decided to stay in the car until the coast was clear.

What do you know, a mere week later, while she was trying to get a drink at the cafeteria, this same person walks up to her and asks "Excuse me, do I know you from somewhere?" which got her berbulu, because this girl and her had gone for extensive lunches and dinners together, and even had long conversations about how "You're so nice, auntie! *giggle2*".

I mean, seriously, macam tak logik je tak kenal kalau dah berheartfeltconversation banyak2 kali kan? nak nak kalau you've actually dated the person's son. Insulting lah bongok. Kalau dah recognise to just come by and say Hi and tanya khabar la toksah la ber "do I know you" bagai. Eksyen gila.

Anyway, at which point, my mil answered "NO!" (yes, exactly the way I typed it). This girl had the cheek to insist and insist a few (read: MANY) times that "I could have sworn I knew you from somewhere. Are you sure we haven't met before?" to which the answers were "NO!" "NO!" "I DON'T KNOW YOU!" and "NO!".

Something like this happened to me too, but with the girl's best friend (small world kot, saling kenal mengenali.

Gila lah. Hehe.

p/s: To be fair, maybe the girl got amnesia. I don't know. Wallahualam.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

As you read this...

I am lounging carelessly at the balconey of an apartment in Port Dickson, listening to the musical sound of the waves crashing against the shore, breathing in the fresh salty air, throwing my face against the lovely caress of the oceanside winds.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Mexican Hazelnuts

No, this post has nothing to do with Hazelnuts that are of Mexican origins.

My friend and I had to stay up to finish our chapters 4 and 5 of our thesis. So we decided to treat ourselves to some Coffee Bean. I was all gung ho about ordering an espresso shot so I'd be able to stay up when I saw the sign. It turns out that Coffee Bean has an on-going promotion: Hazelnut Drinks. I oviously went crazy and started whining to my husband about how I wanted an espresso shot but was forced to take the Hazelnut instead (simply because it'd be a sin not to, check my "about me" section). So in all spirit of coffee, he decided to get me a double shot Hazelnut Latte. It was sinful. Sedap gila.

So anyway, yesterday I went over to Coffee Bean again and got the Hazelnut Ice Blended. It tasted even better. I want more now. I wanted to post some pictures of me and the drink (read: me with a HUGE smile on my face sebab I finally found a hazelnut drink that tastes awesome) but my laptop won't detect my phone. Boo.

Btw, If you've cravings for Mexican food, silalah check out Caliente in Kota Damansara. We had a surprise birthday dinner for one of my husband's best friends there, and the food is cheaaappp (less than 20 ringgit per dish) and reaaallly good. So far, I've tasted the Nachos, the Quesadillas (gila punya sedap), the Chimicanggas (not sure how it's spelt, but basically, they're fried burritos) aaaannnnddd, for dessert, we had the chocolate chimichangga (ok, ok, ok, sinfully sedap and I felt like swooning when I had my first bite. Seriously sedap gila). No pictures because I'm a lazybum.

Friday, October 31, 2008

So Beautiful...

God my fingers burn,
Now when I think of touching your hair
You have changed so much that I don't know,
If I can call you and tell you I care
And I would love to bring you down,
Plant your feet back on the ground

You think you're so beautiful

-Pete Murray, So Beautiful-

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

So there.

Reasons why I shouldn't be writing this post:

1. My research chapters 1, 2 and 3 have yet to be ammended

2. I still have my Family Counselling final project to complete by tomorrow

3. My first paper is on thursday (and NOT friday like I thought earlier. Bodoh, Zurin, Bodoh. You need to get your memory checked. Or at least your attention span.) and I haven't started revising AT ALL

4. I need to start planning the trip we're having (although no one seems to be up for it anymore)

5. I am super super busy.

Reasons why I AM writing this post.

1. I really have no idea how to redraft those chapters and frankly speaking, I have no mood to do so

2. Since the research paper is top priority, I can't get started on my final project (eceh)

3. Since the research paper is top priprity and the final project is priority no.2, I can't start studying yet (alasan bongok)

4. No one seems to be up for the trip anymore

5. I don't WANT to be super busy. It means I don't get enough sleep and I stuff my face because I work my brain all day and I get hungry really really fast.


GOD, I'll be glad when this is OVER.

Sunday, October 26, 2008


If you're even thinking about hurting any one of my family members, think again.
Because if you ever do, I promise, you won't get away with it as easily as you think you can. I don't care how creepy this sounds, but you won't get away with it. I'll get to you before KARMA does.

Max Payne: The Movie

1. I'm not really a gamer but I watch my husband pay sometimes, and really don't think that's the way the story goes.

2. If you're looking for a lot of actions, guns and bullet time, you'll be disappointed because there's like, probably one of each.

3. Bad guy 1: Let's just shoot him now!
Bad guy 2: No! We have to make it as complicated as possible! I know you want to shoot him and dump him in the lake/sea/river/whatever, but that's not the way! first, you're gonna cuff him. ok? done? alright. I'm gonna spout some confession stuff and make him really mad now. Hey dude, i killed your wife and kid! yeah, i did i did. (Max gets really mad)
Bad guy 1: Wtf are you doing? Let me shoot him!
Bad guy 2: Not yet. Okay, now I'm gonna put two vials of the drug that makes soldiers really powerful and makes them feel invincible in battle. (to Max) haha! I'm gonna throw you in the river and people are gonna think you're a druggie who committed suicide! haha! ... Okay, next step, I'm gonna carry this heavy thingy over. Hey, bad guy 1, bring that rope over will y-... agghh! Oh no! Max beat the shit out of us even with the handcuffs cuz I made him mad and he jumped into the river/lake/sea/whatever! Oh, don't worry. It's really cold. He'll freeze to death! He won't suddenly get the will to live after almost dying and swim out and drink the vials and get powerful and try to take revenge on me or anything.... (which makes sense, but logic doesn't really count in the movie)

4. The whole "supernatural" angels with wings bla bla bla stuff is total bs.

5. the coolest part in the movie was after all the "action" was over and they showed a montage of guns and bullets and stuff. Seriously.

I know Iezu warned us and all, but I was too curious about it, and frankly speaking, so was my husband since he plays the game. But here I am, telling you right now, the movie is NOT worth it.


Friday, October 24, 2008

Gambar pagi raya haritu.

-Edited with

Wednesday, October 22, 2008


Half of my thesis got rejected and I have yet to do the other half since I've been swamped with other assignments. Does that mean that

a) My thesis is 0% complete; and
b) That I'm quite dead?

I think so lah.

*post orang dah nak dapat nervous break down.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008


*Taken from (The Customer is) Not Always Right

Entropy Strikes Again
Movie Theater | Illinois, USA

(A woman came up to the concession counter with a tub of popcorn.)

Me: “Yes, can I help you?”


Me: “It is? That’s weird, it shouldn’t be. I just made several batches, so I can get you another one.”

(The popcorn was ice cold, which was odd considering it usually stayed warm for a few hours.)

Me: “Just wondering, when did you buy this popcorn?”

Woman: “Yesterday.”

Me: “…”

LOL. I stumbled upon this website yesterday and it's FUNNY.

Anyway, I read the entry above and remembered that my sister's boyfriend, who works with the Ministry of Health once told me that a disgruntled customer sent in a complaint about a food product that was full of mould. Upon questioning, he admitted that he bought it 2 years ago and that it had been in the freezer ever since. *sigh*.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Some people say...

... that it's easier to work with strangers than it is with friends...
To my surprise, I now agree with the statement.


Know how some people always say that love and hate are on two sides of the same coin?
Well, guess what.... they're on the same t-shirt. :p hehe

Silalah click.

Click here to see blog orang BONGOK.

How would you like it if I called your people Idiotsial? Mesti sakit ati, tak suka kan?

You know what though? I'm not going to, because I know there are a lot of decent people there that probably don't share your idiot sentiments. I know enough not to overgeneralize and kutuk bangsa orang sesuka hati.

So just enjoy your 15 seconds of infamy. Because I'm sure to you, any attention is good attention right?

Sunday, October 19, 2008


I know I've been bitching a lot lately, I guess I'm either surrounded by idiots or I'm too intolerant. Here comes another session:

1. Just because someone mentions the word 'malay' or 'islam' does not mean they're racist. So before you place your judgment on them and start screaming out or whispering out loud to someone who's not interested, the word 'racist', rethink. It's probably better that you keep your big mouth shut and duduk diam2.

2. Do you even know the meaning of respect? When someone is giving a speech/conducting a meeting up front, boleh tak DIAM? Ni tak. borak2 macam orang tu invisible, pastu bila kena sound siap nak buat muka2 stress pehal? You're the one who doesn't know how to respect the person in front. Agaknya sebab tu la masa ko practicum students tannak dengar when you're teaching kan?

3. And when you haven't even been listening to someone's hard-prepared speech, what gives you the right to evaluate them as badly as you can? Takkan la it's wrong for someone to lean more towards talking about religion in their speech? To me, it's fine, as long as he's not biased or memerli menyakitkan hati, but you don't know that, do you? Because you were busy BITCHING kat belakang and menyakitkan hati semua orang around you. Am I right?

4.And who are you to talk anyway? You've been biased towards people just because of little flaws they have. Come on la. Kita semua humans ok? I always try to remember that no matter how badly a person behaves. We all make mistakes, we're all not perfect. I really don't find it necessary for anyone to make fun of someone incessantly and repeatedly just because they're fat/too thin/whatever flaws lah. Macamla ko tu hensem sangat. Just because ramai orang nak kat kau, tak semestinya kau good-looking dalam luar ok? Kalau camni perangai tak tau la kenapa pompuan tu nak kat kau sebenarnye.

5. Boleh tak jangan sakitkan hati orang? Your jokes are NOT FUNNY. If people fail to laugh, then take a hint and stop insisting on people to listen to what you have to say. Ni tak. Suka critique orang, tapi tanak pulak yang membina, kutuk je lebih. Depan2 pulak tu. Get a life la tolong sikit.

6. Jangan main cakap orang tu orang ni kaya plis. Kalau ye pon bukan diorang yang kaya. mak bapak/husband/wife/atok/nenek/pakcik/makcik diorang yang banyak duit, bukan duit diorang pon. If ye pon memang duit diorang, and diorang dapat cara halal, with hard work and strife, apa ko nak sibuk tension2 perli2? Eleh, macam aku tak tau ko beli videocam baru, kereta proton baru, semua duit mak bapak ko kan? Kereta proton tu siap tukar rim, tuka upholstery, takde pon orang nak perli2 kau. Orang diam je, because we all know it's your rezeki. Jangan la nak dengki2 sampai question orang tu orang ni "Ko boleh ke makan kat sini? Ye la, mamak je kan?" tak ke tercekik minah depan ko tu? bodoh.

7. Dahla tu. stop being so fake. We all know what you're really like, cuma taknak cakap je takut it'll affect your studies. See? You've been such an arse, but people are still thinking of your studies. Sedar diri sikit, please.

Ish. tak suka geram2 camni but when people act like idiots, and there's no way to tell them, because it might affect them badly, then this seems to be the only option of letting out whatever stress there is.

Saturday, October 18, 2008


As I stood at that hall that we've used countless times for events, organizing my own, I realised how apt it was that we're spending what was supposed to be 3 days turned to 2 in a hall that we spent our very first week in.
I spoke at the podium for the first and the last time, and I looked at these familiar faces, the ones I saw practically every day for four years and it hit me that in a few short weeks time, I won't being seeing them anymore.
A rush of sadness actually flooded through me because soon, I'm gonna have to let go of the familiarity that I've felt everyday. Of walking past the guardhouse, hoping that my dressing won't offend the pakciks and makciks stationed there, of joining a group of friends or acquaintances at the TESL Square as I wait for class to start.
Funnily enough, it wasn't only the thought of not seeing friends everyday anymore, it was actually the thought of not seeing every single person I've been used to seeing that made me sad.
I'm not gonna lie and say that I'm peachy keen with every single person I know. I realise that some friendships may be lost and can never be recovered. Dah memang takde jodoh nak berkawan, kan. Some have stayed really strong from part one till now and will hopefully go on afterwards. Some friendships I made in the middle of my course of study. Some people I just got to know during my last semester and wish that I had gotten to know sooner.
We've been through 4 years, some of pure torture, but we got through them in the end, and I know many, like me, are struggling with deadlines, escpecially AE right now, but guess what, we'll get through that too, InsyaAllah.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

In love...

With munchkin cats... They're so cute, kaki pendek and chubby2... I want one!

btw, picture is courtesy of Lolcats

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Being Married

It's been 10 months, going on 11, yet it still feels new. I find out new things about him everyday, and in the process, I'm also getting to know myself a little better. It's weird how I kept saying that I didn't need anyone to define who I am, but being married to someone who is able to complement me, it seems that I've only just started discovering who I am.

Little by little, I've learned things and changed my priorities. Some things that I never thought I would be, I now am, and things that I thought would happen to me somehow never came up. At least, not yet, anyway. I take the bad in with the good. Our lives are not perfect. We have arguments, and I have my moments of idiocy, but I find that having someone understand me, or at least try so hard to do so is something that's so refreshing and wonderful.

Sometimes, insecurities come out, and things that used to be alright while we were dating is suddenly not alright anymore. Alhamdulillah, though, we've both been able to adapt to the changes so far without much of a struggle.

People say that the first year of marriage is one of the toughest. It's been a breeze, so far, but it might be because we're lucky. You see, both of us are still studying and we rely on support from our parents. At the end of this year, we will be graduating, closing one chapter in our lives and opening a new one, which I predict will be full of challenges, for the both of us. I suppose we'll see then, if this really is as easy as it seems to be, when our responsibilities to other things besides each other come crashing down.

Then we'll know how strong we really are.
I mentioned foul-weathered friends the other day. Now let's talk about fair-weathered ones. Kelakar kan? Manusia ni macam2 jenis ada. Most, though, come flocking because you've got things you can give them and leave when they no longer need those things/ when you no longer have the means to provide them.

I used to get lots of text messages from this one person.

Person: Zurin, ko buat apa?

Me: Takde pape. nape?

Person : Takde, aku ingat nak ajak g (insert destination)

Me: (ever willing to lepak with a friend) ok, boleh je. Aku free harini. Bila nak g?

Person: Jap g lah, aku mandi jap, pastu kita g. KO DAH SAMPAI KO MSG AKU EK?

Aku ni mati2 la ingat dia ikhlas nak ajak keluar. rupe2nya nak beli beg/barang makanan/baju/whatever. pastu dah. terus balik.

Or on the way home from sending,

Person: Zurin, ko lepas ni buat apa?

Me: Takde pape. (yes, I didn't have a life back then. I had just broken up with my ex-boyfriend and I wasn't inclined to go out that much)

Person: Aku ngan Ms X nak g (insert local shopping mall here). Jom arr..


Aku ingat nak mintak ko hantar gi (insert whatever)

isk. Back then, I didn't mind. Tak suka la berkira2 with friends, so I helped whenever I could, thinking this person really was a friend.


I stopped driving. All calls/text messages/invites stopped. Completely.

Tak tau la apa species orang dia ni kan, but I remember how she used to ask for all kinds of things, like notes and stuff, but when it came to favours I asked from her, it seemed SO difficult to do. Kalau tolong pon with muka masam and tak ikhlas sampai finally, I decided not to ask for help from her anymore since doing favours seemed really difficult from her compared to ASKING FOR THEM.


Tuesday, October 14, 2008

You left me wondering if I even got through to you.

It's like everything I said that day just fell on blind ears.
Does your conscience only last a day when it comes to me?

Monday, October 13, 2008


I just found out how to autopublish. So this is an autopublished entry. :p doing this for fun.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

A very funny story...

I was talking to a friend of mine today and I found out that around the time that I was getting married, someone had gone up to this friend and asked him, "Kenapa Epol and Zurin nak kawen ek? Did something happen?" (implying that I was pregnant out of wedlock, to blurr people out there)
This friend, being one of our best friends, of course, got pissed off and replied negatively and a fight ensued because she was just SO convinced that SOMETHING had happened. Kelakar la.

Ni la, mentality typical melayu kan? Suka nak prasangka buruk kat orang.
FYI for anyone who ever thought that something fishy was going on, let me clarify:

I got married because I was (and still is) in love with a great person who loves me sincerely for who I am, bad or good.

Even though a small part of getting hitched was due to the fact that I spent a lot of time with him and in my religion, it is stated as so that if two people spend that much time with each other, it's better to get married if they have the means to support each other monetarily, mentally, spiritually and physically, I got married simply BECAUSE I WANTED TO.

So, retards, seeing that I've been married for 10 months and MIRACULOUSLY (since some people were apparently adamant about me being pregnant) no babies have popped up, I went through my practicum without any hitches and I did not have to take ANY time off to hide any aby bumps, I think you can conclude that no, I didn't get married to cover any misdeeds that I got myself into.

Also, before I hear people saying stuff like "Dia tu mandul ke, 10 bulan takde anak lagi?" I'd like to state that we CHOOSE not to have babies yet simply because we cannot afford to take care of one. We are neither physically, economically, or mentally prepared.

So before you judge me, please look in the mirror and improve yourself first. thank you.


I wanted to post something that happened recently tapi macam malas nak cerita panjang2.
The thing is, bila orang tak sedar diri and refuse to sedarkan diri, who am I to want to shake them until they wake up or at least tampar so that they get a shock of their lives kan? Tapi to me, kalau nak buat2 tak sedar2 camtu pon, cukupla sekadar susahkan diri sendiri and pihak lagi satu yang tak sedar diri jugak tu.
Janganla menyusahkan orang lain! Wake up and smell the crap you've been flinging around, PLSKTHXBAI.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008


As I was blog-hopping today, I came across this blog of a woman who had lost her child two years ago. The baby was sick with some disease that didn't seem curable and the parents were faced with the devastating decision of keeping her intubated or letting nature run its course. I suppose, unable to take the sight of their baby going through so much pain, they decided on the latter.

Her husband's account of the baby's passing was overwhelming and I couldn't help but shed a tear for this little family's pain.

Imagine becoming a mother and not being able to bathe your baby girl until the day she has passed on just because she's been sick and intubated since birth.

Imagine watching your precious little bundle sick and almost constantly in pain throughout her short 150 days of life.

I admire this family's courage and strength in the way they handled their crisis and I can only hope that if I was ever faced with something equally devastating, I'd be just as strong.

I'm thankful, everyday for what I have, my loving family, my husband, those friends who've stuck by me through thick and thin.

To Viruspadu and family, I wish you all well and I'm very sure your little angel is watching out for all of you from heaven. Al-Fatihah.

Simply Breakfast

I'm gonna seem like such a pig after this entry...
But as I was blog-hopping, I came across this blog: Simply Breakfast: The Art Of Breakfast, and I thought it was brilliant, cause I've always loved breakfast food... (actually, I love any kind of food, but that's beside the point)

When I grew up, I used to stay over at my friends' houses a lot, especially when we had some sort of special event during the night or early morning after. I found that they always had scrumptious breakfasts. I mean, yeah, breakfast at home was great too, but how much of roti canai, nasi lemak, mi goreng and its like, pulut, etc. can one take? After a while, you kinda start searching for more, and more I got, whenever I slept over at someone's place.

I loved the different kinds of cereals, the ones I didn't have at home, the sausages and eggs cooked in all kinds of ways, the grilled tomatoes and pancakes and... the list goes on.

Until now, I look forward to buffet breakfasts at hotels whenever I go for holidays, even though I make these kinds of breakfasts at home. It just seems way yummier when someone else makes them, I suppose...

So breakfast freaks, click on the picture above, or the link, feast your eyes and start drooling.. ;p

p/s: the picture is courtesy of Simply Breakfast. It's not mine.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Food List

People usually do this during Puasa, but for some reason, I suddenly have all these cravings...

1. Spaghetti Aglio Olio
I went to Dome's the other day but for some reason, the branch in BSC axed their Spicy Olio Pasta off the menu so BOO to you, Dome's BSC! My husband's supposed to cook it for me this weekend. He makes amazing Aglio Olio.

2. Famous Amos cookies
Pecan nut chocolate chip. Yum.

3. Lasagne

4. Spagetti Bolognaise
Notice how there's a lot of Italian on this list? Yum. My husband makes good Bolognaise too. Mine's sedap jugak I suppose, tapi biasa je. His is like 'Whoa!"

5. Cranky Salmon Roll
From Rakuzen. Sedapp okay? It melts in your mouth...

6. Asam Laksa
This one comes and goes. If I have this craving, I need it NOW NOW NOW or else it won't be there the next day

7. Soto
This one is reaaallllly difficult to find. I mean, granted it's being sold everywhere, but trying to locate a decent one seems impossible. Nak kena nenek jugak buat kottt.
(When you google "soto pictures", you actually get pictures of some dude who's all beefed up and stuff. ugh.)

8. Any weird thing (sometimes multiples) at any given time. Ikut mood, ikut rasa and ikut whatever I've seen on tv/someone eating/pictures of. Lol.

Lapar dah. Esok puasa enam!