Thursday, April 29, 2010


LOL. Orang sekarang ni kan, sikit2 buat hate group, sikit2 buat hate group. I swear, some people are total dumbasses and should never be let close to technology sebab ada je dalam kepala dia nak bikin huru-hara.

Someone kutuks your kind/race/institution/country/city/belief on facebook. Big friggin deal. Don't tell me you've never ever said something bad about someone else before. Tak pernah? Seriously? You must be a friggin angel then. WHOAH!

Then I seriously, seriously salute you because you must be the ONLY person on planet earth who has never kutuk orang lain, EVER. Baik betul kamu ni.

I mean, seriously. If everyone who ever said something bad or given negative opinion about something gets a friggin hate page, every single one of us would have one. And then who's there left to join?

I keep saying.Otak dah ada. Guna. Kalau sampai orang tak boleh give opinions, then baik tak payah maju lah. Belajar tinggi2 tapi macam tak pernah masuk sekolah langsung. Otak caveman. Bodoh.

If you dunno what I'm babbling about silalah to my Facebook profile and take a look at the latest link i posted. Haih. dunia, dunia.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

How it feels.

I'm dazed and confused. The past few weeks have been somewhat disturbing, to say the least. My heart feels like it's been through a washing machine, spun and soaked to its very core. I wake up with such a heavy feeling in my stomach everyday. Because I can't figure out where it went wrong.

Every night before I go to sleep, the same, pathetic, sorry words seem to come out of my mouth: "I'm nobody's ______". And my husband can't seem to do anything about it but to say that "You're my zurin. You don't have to be anybody's ______".

I never ever thought in a million years I'd feel this way about this person. How can you rectify this with someone you've loved so deeply your whole life without hurting them? Because I have no idea if I'm overreacting, or if my own hurt is justified.

But I've cried too many times over it to even ignore it and push it aside anymore.

God help me. I'm trying.

Saturday, April 17, 2010


Something's wrong with the template. There's double of everything, and for some reason, I can't get into my own private posts. Ah well.

I seriously can't be arsed to fix it at the moment, so biarlah for now.. :/

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Quarter of a Century

25th Whismical Birthday Cake

I turn 25 today. You'd think I'd feel a bit more mature. You'd think I'd have gained a bit more confidence in myself after having gone through 25 years of macam-macam.

I don't really. I still feel like the awkward, unsure little girl who stepped out of high school, into university 6 years ago. Who stepped onto the stage to receive my scroll a year back. I don't feel any wiser.

I'm still me :)

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The Past, Present and Future

Someone from the past came back into my life a few days ago. I'm happy to say that I managed to put it all behind us and accept what happened as fate leading me to another direction. And I'm comfortable with where going right now, and the person I'm going with. :)

Currently, my appetite has returned with a huge boom! Ermm, not exactly. I can eat a full meal now, but I no longer feel hungry every 2 hours, and the portions that I'm able to eat are enough that I don't feel like a pig. That probably means that my hormone levels are back to normal :). I've started swimming again, which is great because I need some exercise after the ridiculously long recovery time from the first surgery.

I'm also happy to say that we've decided to start a little family of our own. However, due to the near future plans, which we've already put cash into, it's gonna have to wait until at least a few months more. Till then, I have Langkawi to look forward to, and hopefully, my masters in a few months time, assuming I get accepted.

Life is great.

Sometimes I'm Stupid.

Aku tak kisah la orang nak meluahkan perasaan ke apa ke. Tapi aku kisah yang makhluk2 ni cari aku bla ada masalah je. Lepas tu merungut je kerja. Merungut tanpa cari jalan menyelesaikan masalah. Bila aku bagi option, tak pernah nak dengar, tak pernah nak ikut. Esok2 phone lagi, cakap benda yang sama je. lusa phone lagi, masalah sama lagi. Aik? Yang aku berbuih mulut bagi advise tu kau ikut tak? Oh, tak rupanya. Kalau kau tak reti2 nak grow some balls and solve your own problems, boleh tak jangan paksa aku dengar masalah kau. Nama pun masalah kau, bukan masalah aku. Lagipun, kau bukan orang penting dalam hidup aku. Kalau kau salah sorang dari kawan aku yang memang tetiap minggu kalau tak call, message, kalau tak message, chat, kalau tak chat, jumpa, takpe lah. Itu lain cerita, kalau diorang nak call aku hari2 bagitau masalah diorang pun aku tak kisah.

Aku tau, ada masalah yang memang tak dapat nak buat apa2. Yang tu lain lah. Dah memang tak boleh nak selesaikan, so terpaksala duk diam je ataupun luahkan aje perasaan tu. Tu aku tak kisah la, sebab aku pun takleh fikir cara nak selesaikan. Aku sanggup dengar je, lebih2 lagi kalau aku sayang orang tu.

Yang aku cakap ni pasal orang2 yang suka sangat cari aku cuma bila ada masalah. Yang bila happy, dengar suara pun susah, ni pulak nak nampak batang hidung kan? Tolong jangan ganggu hidup aku lagi kalau kerja kau cuma nak menyerabutkan otak aku. Tolong berhenti rungutan2 yang sangat membosankan tu. Betul2 aku cakap, aku bosan.

Sikit2 "sampaiii hati dia". sikit "tapi dia buat camtu pun aku sayaaannngg sayang dia, zurin. Sayaaannggggg". eh, dah la tu. Dulu ko ada chance ko buat taik, sekarang baru nak bersampai hati bagai. tolong cermin diri sikit. It's friggin over.

Now go get a life and stop bothering mine.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Have You Noticed?

Facebook has become a very powerful medium indeed. Case in point, it showed up on my wall two days ago that a friend of mine was tagged in a photo by a blogshop owner showcasing her new stock. I was intrigued, and I clicked on the photo, and voila, fell in love with one of the products. :)

So I hopped into the blogshop and proceeded to make the proper transactions.

I haven't had the urge to shop online in months, and I have never heard of this blogshop before. Yet, with the simple act of tagging one of my friends in the picture, she somehow ended up with one new customer.

So it's no surprise that a lot of people are utilizing this commodity to the fullest.
Jomgig has even created a contest to attract people, using Facebook as it's medium and I honestly think that it's one really smart idea. Congrats to whoever who made the contest happen. :p BTW, go here if you happen to feel like winning a camcorder or some ipod shuffles.

What I do want to talk about here is how it's being misused. Of late, I've noticed an onslaught of hate pages popping up like mushrooms. If someone makes a mistake by speaking their minds, you can be sure someone else will sniff it out just like a hound dog, and create a page to ban/delete/petition that person off facebook.

It's all well and good to be intolerant of racism and pure rudeness, but creating these fan pages attract the worse kind of people. People who think it's ok to counter these racist and rude remarks with more racism and rudeness. So if it's not ok for the person who did it, why do they think its ok for them?

The way I see it, there are two types of offenders:

The first type is someone who is just out to get attention.
I firmly believe that the boy (yes, he's a boy, which explains it)who recently came into the limelight because of his atrocious comments on a recently deceased comedian is just trying to get attention. And congratulations to him, he got it because all these people who don't know the meaning of trolling are flooding to the masses to his hate page and condemning the heck out of him with even more hateful remarks. Not too smart, eh?

Type number two are people who spoke out of anger at a certain situation without thinking of the repercussions. Which means that they might have meant what they said at the time, but only because they were ruled by strong feelings of anger, or remorse or sadness or annoyance. I remember how some people of a certain religion got offended by what this girl said out of anger on Facebook (admittedly, what she said was very racist and extremely insolent, but she was driven by the chaos that was going on at the time). They created a hate page, demanding an apology from her, calling her all kinds of names. She gave them what they wanted and apologised. Did they stop hating on her?


How do you deal with type 1? Ignore them, because once they've milked all the attention they can out of the controversy they made, they'll probably shut up. All they want is their 15 minutes of fame, and the best we can all do is simply by NOT GIVING IT TO THEM.

As for type 2, leave them alone lah. They realise their mistake and frankly speaking, talking about burning down their houses or beating them to a pulp or worse, raping them so their husbands will get disgusted at them and not touch them (this really is a comment I saw on one hate page) really doesn't make you a better person.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Dah Nak Kiamat kot. Part 2

1. The VERY definition of 'Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Fire', 'Sudah Jatuh Ditimpa Tangga'.
A girl gets raped by a taxi driver and gets dumped at the side of the road in some semak somewhere. She gets up, walks around pretty much aimlessly, trying to get cars to stop and help.
A lorry driver stops and agrees to help her, (and, you guessed it) brings her to some semak, rapes her and dumps here there.

2. Illegal
A girl is on the way home from college when the LRT breaks down at Pasar Seni. She is forced to get down and look for a taxi. (This is around 8pm). Out of nowhere, 6 Indonesians (most probably of the illegal alien TAK SEDAR DIRI kind,) show up, tried to get her to hand over her handbag and whatnot and attempts to take her clothes off too.
Luckily, a taxi driver (obviously not the same man from above) shows up just in time to scare the assholes away and proceeds to driver her to the nearest safe stop where a family member picked her up.

Saturday, April 3, 2010


Definition: Self-seekers who try to win favours by flattery.

I don't like sycophants. Depan2 beriya2 puji, buat muka manis sangat sampai gula pun tak manis macam tu.

Buat tak tau jelah kalau tak suka. Buat biasa tak boleh? Ni puji lebih2 just to get someone's secret out lepas tu pegi bagitau orang kutuk2 semua.

Bab puji-puji tu yang tak tahan.

I'm just saying.

*This post has no relations to anyone I know.

Tapi kalau tetiba terasa pedas tu, janganla makan cili eh?

Friday, April 2, 2010

After a week...

1. My cuts are healing very nicely. Pedih kadang2 je (i.e: late at night when I'm sleeping soundly and forget I just had surgery and scratch my cut sebab gatal, only remembering when I feel the slight sharp pain and the thread at my fingers *brr*)

2. My appetite hasn't really returned, because I get realy muak of whatever I'm eating after only 5-6 suaps. But at least I'm not gorging myself anymore (read: yet) and my tummy is no longer rejecting solid food.

3. The inner wounds seem to be healing well too, since I don't feel much pain whenever I move around anymore, and the best thing is, I can now tidur mengiring once again without feeling any pain. Yay!

4. The pening2 still comes around quite often. In fact, I feel pening as I'm typing this. I don't like this part. I don't know if it's because of the medicine ke apa. According to my dad, the anesthesia hasn't really worn off yet, tapi it's been a week whattt.... *sigh*

That's all :)