Choose Wisely

Sometimes, I don't understand men. I'm married to one, yes, obviously, but I'd have to say that he's not very typical. I understand him better than I do most other men and yet there are still some thing about him that my simpleton mind is unable to grasp. Like how he insists on chucking all his dirty laundry on the floor. Or how he can spend hours and hours in front of the computer/laptop (yes, he has both) playing a game or reading comics without getting hungry or tired or sleepy.

Regardless of this, I am still very thankful for the fact that I have him and no one else (I am talking as if other people would actually want me.LOL) simply for the fact that he is a MAN. Not a boy.

Here are the differences between men and boys.

1. A MAN breaks up with you when he no longer thinks the relationship is working. A BOY simply disappears and makes excuses while he leaves you hanging.

I've witnessed this countless of times before. People, if you don't want her anymore, then let her go. Don;t leave her there wondering what's going on, if the relationship is still going strong and if so, why you don't seem to want to contact her. It's just distasteful. Set her free so that she can find a new life and hopefully, someone MUCH better than you who actually treats her like a human being.

And girls, please. If the boyfriend refuses to grow some balls and make some decisions, you HAVE to do it. Give him an ultimatum. Buck up or get out. Pure and simple. I'm a girl too. I realise how difficult it is to let go of someone you (think?) you love but sometimes, you have to be selfish and think "I am better than that. I'm better than him".

2. A MAN treats you like a woman should be treated. A BOY treats you like a toy/pet.

This is, in theory, not a very difficult concept to grasp but people seem to have problems with it anyway. It's simple: If he calls you only when he's bored, takes you out only when it suits him, talk to you only when there's absolutely no one else to talk to, he's a boy.

Retreat slowly, and when he's not looking, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE.

3. A MAN puts you at the top of his list of priorities. Expect to be way below on a Boy's. His friends WILL come first.

True story. This one guy I know treats us (his friends) like queens/kings. He's nice, approachable, always there for us, is concerned to the point of being slightly ridiculous. Basically, he's someone who I KNOW would wake up at 3 AM, get out of bed and come to my rescue if I called him in distress.

And yet, when he's with his girlfriend, he's so different it's mind boggling. The way he looks at her, the way he treats her, the way he TALKS to her. It's like she's the most unimportant thing in his life.

How do I put this BOY in the same league as the person I know? I don't. There's FRIEND and there's BOY. They're two totally different entities that share the same body to me.

4. A MAN reassures you when you're being insecure and paranoid. A BOY just gets offended and snaps your head off.

It's real simple. Everyone has their insecurities. If you're matured enough to understand that you'll deal with it tastefully instead of losing your head and being a delinquent about it.

All a woman needs is reassurance that she's still the most important person in your life and that you have eyes only for her. No need to accuse her to not trusting you, or of being clingy (unless she really is).

5. A MAN stays true. A BOY cheats.

Boys will have many excuses for this, ranging from "I was never happy!" to "I'm bored" to "menyampah" to "They each have what the other doesn't. I can't let go, I love them both"


Girls, if you're in a realtionship with a BOY, reconsider, PLEASE. It's not worth it. Really.

AVILLION ADMIRAL COVE PD

1. Upon arriving, we were horrified to find out that at least two walls were covered in tarp, still under construction

2. On the ground floor driveway, there were white boards covering a portion of the place, indicating that there were sections still not ready

3. After scrutinizing the windows/sliding doors from outside, it was obvious that a whole lot of rooms were still unfurnished, and seemingly incomplete

4. They had just laid down the welcome mats

5. There was no direct access to the carpark from the lift since they CLOSED IT DOWN due to construction

6. The carpark was glaringly under construction, with sounds of drills and hammering echoing through the lobby

7. Upon entering our room, about 5 minutes later, some guys knocked on the door claiming that they had wanted to DO SOME MAINTENANCE WORK ON THE ROOM and had no idea that guests had just checked in

8. A portion of the wall of the room was not painted properly yet

(The next few are mengada complaints on my part. They were due to circumstances, not the fault of the resort or the staff itself)

9. There was no balconey

10. There was no beach

11. I couldn't hear the waves! ALl I could hear from my window was drilling and the sound of the vent of the marina club downstairs

(back to proper compaints now)

12. When we tried to check out, they claimed that they could not refund our money because we had booked on fucking line.

13. they did NOTHING to compensate our dissatisfaction

14.They insisted we pay up the full amount.

TAPIIIIII...

15. When my mother in law called to yell at them, boleh la pulaakkkk refund our money. Macam mana tu?

My question is, my dear Avillion Admiral Cove administration

1. Why, oh, why did you not warn people on your website that YOU WERE NOT READY TO RECEIVE GUESTS?

2. Do you always pull con-jobs on your guests?

3. Oh, and by the way, I overheard a conversation one of your receptionists had with a potential guest who wanted to book a night there, I HEARD NO WARNINGS WHATSOEVER ABOUT THE INCOMPLETE STATE OF YOUR RESORT.

TOLONG LAH JAWAB, and spare me those "sorry sir, ma'am. There's abso-fucking-lutely nothing we can do. SO sorry so sorry so sorry". Those you can shove up your ass. ( I realise that these people won't have the time to read this but it makes me feel good ranting anyway)



To the BAYU BEACH RESORT

Thanks

1. Simply for being complete and NOT UNDER CONSTRUCTION
2. For not being pretentious
3. For not being fully booked
4. For having a balconey
5. For giving us a seaview room
6. From which I can hear the waves
7. For actually having a beach out back.

*On another note, I would like to state here the the AVILLION ADMIRAL COVE would probably be a really nice resort WHEN IT IS FINALLY OFFICIALLY COMPLETE. TAPII sebab they tried to pull one over us, I'd just like to recommend you NOT TO GO THERE. hmph. puas hati.

So there.

Reasons why I shouldn't be writing this post:

1. My research chapters 1, 2 and 3 have yet to be ammended

2. I still have my Family Counselling final project to complete by tomorrow

3. My first paper is on thursday (and NOT friday like I thought earlier. Bodoh, Zurin, Bodoh. You need to get your memory checked. Or at least your attention span.) and I haven't started revising AT ALL

4. I need to start planning the trip we're having (although no one seems to be up for it anymore)

5. I am super super busy.

Reasons why I AM writing this post.

1. I really have no idea how to redraft those chapters and frankly speaking, I have no mood to do so

2. Since the research paper is top priority, I can't get started on my final project (eceh)

3. Since the research paper is top priprity and the final project is priority no.2, I can't start studying yet (alasan bongok)

4. No one seems to be up for the trip anymore

5. I don't WANT to be super busy. It means I don't get enough sleep and I stuff my face because I work my brain all day and I get hungry really really fast.

Conclusion:

GOD, I'll be glad when this is OVER.

Max Payne: The Movie

1. I'm not really a gamer but I watch my husband pay sometimes, and really don't think that's the way the story goes.

2. If you're looking for a lot of actions, guns and bullet time, you'll be disappointed because there's like, probably one of each.

3. Bad guy 1: Let's just shoot him now!
Bad guy 2: No! We have to make it as complicated as possible! I know you want to shoot him and dump him in the lake/sea/river/whatever, but that's not the way! first, you're gonna cuff him. ok? done? alright. I'm gonna spout some confession stuff and make him really mad now. Hey dude, i killed your wife and kid! yeah, i did i did. (Max gets really mad)
Bad guy 1: Wtf are you doing? Let me shoot him!
Bad guy 2: Not yet. Okay, now I'm gonna put two vials of the drug that makes soldiers really powerful and makes them feel invincible in battle. (to Max) haha! I'm gonna throw you in the river and people are gonna think you're a druggie who committed suicide! haha! ... Okay, next step, I'm gonna carry this heavy thingy over. Hey, bad guy 1, bring that rope over will y-... agghh! Oh no! Max beat the shit out of us even with the handcuffs cuz I made him mad and he jumped into the river/lake/sea/whatever! Oh, don't worry. It's really cold. He'll freeze to death! He won't suddenly get the will to live after almost dying and swim out and drink the vials and get powerful and try to take revenge on me or anything.... (which makes sense, but logic doesn't really count in the movie)

4. The whole "supernatural" angels with wings bla bla bla stuff is total bs.

5. the coolest part in the movie was after all the "action" was over and they showed a montage of guns and bullets and stuff. Seriously.

I know Iezu warned us and all, but I was too curious about it, and frankly speaking, so was my husband since he plays the game. But here I am, telling you right now, the movie is NOT worth it.

NOT!

I mentioned foul-weathered friends the other day. Now let's talk about fair-weathered ones. Kelakar kan? Manusia ni macam2 jenis ada. Most, though, come flocking because you've got things you can give them and leave when they no longer need those things/ when you no longer have the means to provide them.

I used to get lots of text messages from this one person.

Person: Zurin, ko buat apa?

Me: Takde pape. nape?

Person : Takde, aku ingat nak ajak g (insert destination)

Me: (ever willing to lepak with a friend) ok, boleh je. Aku free harini. Bila nak g?

Person: Jap g lah, aku mandi jap, pastu kita g. KO DAH SAMPAI KO MSG AKU EK?

Aku ni mati2 la ingat dia ikhlas nak ajak keluar. rupe2nya nak beli beg/barang makanan/baju/whatever. pastu dah. terus balik.

Or on the way home from sending,

Person: Zurin, ko lepas ni buat apa?

Me: Takde pape. (yes, I didn't have a life back then. I had just broken up with my ex-boyfriend and I wasn't inclined to go out that much)

Person: Aku ngan Ms X nak g (insert local shopping mall here). Jom arr..

or

Aku ingat nak mintak ko hantar gi (insert whatever)

isk. Back then, I didn't mind. Tak suka la berkira2 with friends, so I helped whenever I could, thinking this person really was a friend.

SKALI...

I stopped driving. All calls/text messages/invites stopped. Completely.

Tak tau la apa species orang dia ni kan, but I remember how she used to ask for all kinds of things, like notes and stuff, but when it came to favours I asked from her, it seemed SO difficult to do. Kalau tolong pon with muka masam and tak ikhlas sampai finally, I decided not to ask for help from her anymore since doing favours seemed really difficult from her compared to ASKING FOR THEM.

haih.

Disappointment!

A few weeks ago, our faculty announced that our Pre-Graduation Night was going to be organized by them, instead of us. I'm not sure what the official reason is, but word went around that they wanted to take extra precaution that our night doesn't end up the way our seniors' did.

How was our seniors' Night you asked? Well, some genius who obviously either didn't make it to his/her own prom at school or was not the popular prom queen she hoped to be, decided to make it prom themed! With the crowning of a king and queen and everything! Well, sukahati la kan, if you're happy living life everyday like you're still in high school then that's your business. Tapi, this is a formal function, kata cikai sangat sampai you need the RM1000 the faculty doles out for the event, then ikutla dress code university. You invited the dean and a lot of other lecturers, tapi you decided to make the dinner macam ala-ala teenage movie/the o.c/gossip girl/one tree hill macam tu. Don't get me wrong, I watch those too, but never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine my Graduation Night to be like those parties they have in those movies. I'm not kolot, believe me. Nak pakai tube dress ke, hot pants ke, bikini ke, dulik hape aku, tapi ikut occasion boleh tak? If you KNOW that it's compulsory for the DEAN OF YOUR FACULTY FROM YOUR UNIVERSITY WHICH HAS A DRESS CODE to come and officiate the ceremony, please justify the reason you decided to don these outfits, despite the fact that you know it would be considered inappropriate? Not only that, was it so absolutely necessary to have slow-dancing sessions where perempuan and lelaki yang belum kahwin peluk2 macam dah? OK, kau nak make out dengan boyfriend kau ke, nak peluk sampai horny ke, suka hati kaula, tapi jangan buat kat official function DEPAN DEAN boleh tak, bodoh? Now, your juniors are left to sweep after your mess and suffer the consequences of your actions.

Oklah, some people might accuse me of being stupid. If the faculty organises, after all, we get free food, right? Right. But it's not about the free food, it's about the camaraderie. The feeling of being special because it's our last semester. The reward of going through 4 years together, especially the last semester where we worked hard to complete our AE requirement.

See, it wouldn't be so bad if the function was held especially for us. The problem is the fact that they decided to selit-selitkan function tu into the MALAM ANUGERAH DEKAN. Pandai tak? It's like the committee thought "Hmm. What shall we do for these seniors after all they've been through for 4 years? We should make it special, right? I mean, everybody else did something special for their pre-grad night. Tapi.. masa dah suntuk... kitorang bz.. I know! Let's put them in with the DL night. shall we? only we'll call in MALAM PENGHARGAAN sebab nak appreciate seniors AND the pandai juniors jugak!" and everybody else cheered and patted this person in the back for being such a genius at problem solving.

We are not books, okay? Takde maknenye kau ingat kau bleh selit2 je kitorang macam kau selit2 buku atas bookshelf penuh?

To Whom it may Concern,

With all due respect ma'am/sir/dr/prof/datuk/datin, whoever thought of this idea, we, the Part 8 TESL students, class of 2008 would like to formally REJECT the offer of the integration of the Pre-Graduation Dinner with the Dean's List Dinner. Thank you.

Frenemy?

You're great friends with someone. You hang out together all the time, yet you dread seeing them sometimes because you know 8 times out of ten, the person will either tell you how fat/ugly/horrible you look in that dress. Or if you tell them stories, they reply with "Since when were you ________ (cantik/putih/cute/kurus- fill in the blank)". Sakit tak hati? Sakit kot, tetiap kali jumpa kena kutuk kaw-kaw punye...

I mean, you know it's bad when people (yours truly) who have never worried about their weight start thinking they're fat. Padahal takde pun gemuk, if I calculate my BMI. In fact, I went for a blood test and I'm actually quite healthy, but I look in the mirror every day and ask my husband if he thinks I'm fat.

Seriously, sakit hati ok, everty time someone makes those kind of comments. Kalau constructive takpe jugak, tapi comment tu memang sengaja nak sakitkan hati aku. Taula orang lain joke kau pon nak joke jugak tapi isu2 sensitif ni jangan sentuh bleh tak? kalau aku cakap ko pun gemuk, makan banyak, ko pun tersentap kan?

Ermm, ok, enough of the emo-ness... If you think you might have a friend like this but have no idea how to determine if he/she really is a frenemy, read on...

How to Spot a Frenemy

Step1

Understand frenemy variations. Frenemies can range from calculatingly callous and manipulative to obliviously selfish and unkind. Just because a person doesn't "mean" to be mean doesn't erase the hurtful impact. Sometimes an unaware insult is more damaging than a deliberate jab.

Step2

Pay attention to how you act in the presence of your potential frenemy. Do you recoil at the thought of spending time with her? Do you clam up whenever he comes around? Do you often talk bad about her to others? Do you feel competitive when he discusses work, hobbies, love life or finances? If you continually act less than the highest, most loving, centered version of yourself when the two of you get together, take note. A frenemy may be in your midst.

Step3

Trust your initial reactions. The first feelings we have about people and situations are the most accurate. These pure, uncensored observations give us all the information we need to classify somebody as a frenemy. You do yourself a disservice (not to mention set yourself up for more abuse) by analyzing interactions, questioning whether or not you are being too sensitive or making excuses for why a person behaves the way they do. If you feel like you've just received an emotional kick in the gut, then you have just received an emotional kick in the gut. No analysis needed!

Step4

Look for patterns. If somebody lets you down or acts insensitively on occasion, that doesn't necessarily qualify him or her for frenemy status. Humans are flawed and friendships inevitably follow suit. On the other hand, a person who continually uses you for his or her personal agenda, dishes out insults, breaks promises, ignores your requests or manipulates you with passive-aggressive behavior goes beyond the acceptable friendship margin of error.

Step5

Acknowledge your paradoxical feelings. Frenemies are hard to decipher because most of the time they have as many, if not more, positive qualities than negative ones. Frenemies will often share your interests and values; if you didn't have these things in common, it would be easy to qualify your frenemies as enemies and move them off your emotional radar entirely. Love-hate relationships are typical for frenemies.

Step6

Compare and contrast. When trying to decide if a friend is actually a frenemy, weigh the person in question against somebody who you know with complete certainty is a friend. Personality traits become more apparent when viewed this way.

Step7

Seek validation. If you can't sort it out, talk to a trusted friend or mentor. Perspective from a third party can help you get clear about the nature of your mucky, indefinable relationships.

Did you know...

that a study by Peterson and Roscoe (1991) found egocentrism in female college freshmen to be at a level higher than is typically found in some high school students?

For those of you who don't know what egocentrism is and want to find out just a bit more, (I'm a bit lazy to type everything out here since I'm doing this between assignments, which is how i found this article, btw. Bagus tak saya? Ber-blog pasal assignment. hoho) click here.

That would explain the level of egocentrism apparent in many of my female juniors. EVERYTHING is so clear to me now - NO WONDER so many of these girls are so rude and arrogant.

Let me explain what some of these juniors (pre-degree, no less! although most of the degree students share the exact same traits) have done. One very glaring incident of their stupid-mindedness happened during our post-practicum course.

Our lecturer, after observing our torture and hard work (really?) for the past 3 months decided to treat us all to breakfast on the very last day of the course. She put out the buffet table outside. Now, if you were a junior at a university and you came one day and saw that there was a delicious spread of food outside a hall obviously occupied by seniors, would you

1. tell yourself that the food probably belongs to them
2. think "waitaminute, my university is too cheapskate to provide food for EVERYBODY. There must be some kind of function going on that doesn't involve ME"
3. help yourself to the food, with seconds to boot.

If you answered no. 3, then congratulations, you are now on the same par with my tesl juniors! Pat yourself in the back and then get someone to punch your lights out because you are now officially an asshole.

Tip of the iceberg, this one. If any TESL juniors are reading this and you are not one of those bitches who think you own the faculty, I apologise, but please, on my behalf, give those girls a kick in the ass on the behalf of your seniors aye? Thanks

Let me clarify. I am not one who imposes my seniority on people. In fact, I despise seniors who walk around and demand juniors to bend down and lick their boots just because the happen to be older. However, I do NOT remember being such a bitch when I was a junior. While I never fanned my seniors' backsides, I also respected them and never stepped out of line because I know they've been through more and have been around longer.

Tapi, budak2 sial ni, ingat diorang tu bagus sangat. (hah, bila aku mula cakap melayu, ko tau la kesabaran aku dah tahap sini- sambil letak tangan paras kening). Seriously la, ko tu baru setahun jagung kuar sekolah nak berlagak sakan macam ko tu Permaisuri Agong pehal? Ko tau tak Permaisuri Agong yang lepas tu pon sangup menari poco2 dengan student UiTM? Tau tak? Kalau ko perasan sebab bapak ko tu lawyer ke, doctor ke, baik takyah la. Bapak ko kan, bukan ko? Kalau kaa tahap gaban sebab usaha sendiri takpe gak ni harap nak ride on the coattails of your parents? pigi dahhh. Aku lempang sekali berbekas jugak muka ko, sama macam orang lain so jangan la rasa macam ko bagus sangat. You've obviously been disillusioned all these years so let me give you a reality check. You're not that special.