Sunday, April 18, 2010

How it feels.

I'm dazed and confused. The past few weeks have been somewhat disturbing, to say the least. My heart feels like it's been through a washing machine, spun and soaked to its very core. I wake up with such a heavy feeling in my stomach everyday. Because I can't figure out where it went wrong.

Every night before I go to sleep, the same, pathetic, sorry words seem to come out of my mouth: "I'm nobody's ______". And my husband can't seem to do anything about it but to say that "You're my zurin. You don't have to be anybody's ______".

I never ever thought in a million years I'd feel this way about this person. How can you rectify this with someone you've loved so deeply your whole life without hurting them? Because I have no idea if I'm overreacting, or if my own hurt is justified.

But I've cried too many times over it to even ignore it and push it aside anymore.

God help me. I'm trying.

No comments: