Toddler Tantrums

For a couple of months now, we've had this problem where Hana throws tantrums and hits people on the face whenever she doesn't get what she wants.

Truth be told, it got on my nerves, and I would grow extremely impatient and scold her whenever she did it. I tried holding her hand firmly, looking into her eyes and telling her "No!".

I read somewhere that someone had tried reciprocating and hit their baby's hand (softly, of course) and tried that. No dice. It just made her (and myself) even more agitated and made me feel like a total monster afterwards because she just got so hurt and angry whenever I did it.


I tried scolding her but that also made it worse.

Let me tell you, for a hothead like me, it really isn't easy to keep my temper when she misbehaves.

And then one day I decided to try something else.

When I saw her tantrum coming ( which is inevitably accompanied by a slap to the face), I held her about an arm's length away, and said "no, sayang, no hitting, jangan marah-marah" (very gently and nicely) and then after a few seconds, brought her closer and said "come hug mama come, calm down ok?" AND IT WORKED LIKE A CHARM!

She just calmed down after a few seconds and put her head on my shoulder and hugged me! And there was my adorable little baby again.

Now, I'm not saying that this is what will work for everyone. But it works for me. I've been doing this ever since I discovered it, and it works every time. Even my husband was amazed at the "magic".

I guess what I'm saying is that you just gotta keep trying and erring. That's mostly how we get through bringing up a child. Nobody gets it right the first time. It can be frustrating but it's also rewarding when you finally find that one thing.

Also, remember that not every child is the same. What works for my baby may not work for yours, so never ever shove your methods up someone else's nose.